Sexuality always has to be a punchline, because that means he never has to actually examine it in any way. Humor, irony: good. Actually exploring facets of your personality: bad. That's just how it is.

Dirk has no exceptions. Never really has, for anything past one night stands. He certainly has no intention of opening up to anyone. That probably counts for chroma, if you hold hands during or whatever, but the thought gives him metaphysical hives. "IMVU ain't wholesome." People were wild on IMVU. "I'm sure there's somethin' here though. If not, he knows how to build websites.

"Always do," he confirms, though the dick joke--and sword joke--is another prime comeback opportunity, but that's too gay, so he leaves it. "Comin' around to check and make sure I'm behavin'?" Contrary to his pissed-off speech about six inch rulers earlier, this is chill as shit. Mostly because he's already made his stance clear, and he knows Dave won't go against that, even now. "Think so," he finally says, "good as we can get."