[ Meanwhile, Xue Yang lies down on the couch, quietly watching Xiao Xingchen. He's not asleep, not yet, but he's somewhat pretending, slowing his breathing down so that it seems as if he is.
A part of him wonders if this can really be happening. It almost feels like the moment he lets his guard down, he's going to find Shuanghua pushed into his stomach a second time. It's a scene that's haunted him for years; a do-over feels like it should be impossible. It should be impossible, but this place doesn't seem to concern itself with words like that.
Suddenly his years of fantasizing about what he could have said instead to make things turn out differently have become more important than he could have imagined. It's a question of when, not if, it falls apart again. But until then, he needs to be on his best behavior... and he needs to plan what truths are safe for him to reveal this time around.
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A part of him wonders if this can really be happening. It almost feels like the moment he lets his guard down, he's going to find Shuanghua pushed into his stomach a second time. It's a scene that's haunted him for years; a do-over feels like it should be impossible. It should be impossible, but this place doesn't seem to concern itself with words like that.
Suddenly his years of fantasizing about what he could have said instead to make things turn out differently have become more important than he could have imagined. It's a question of when, not if, it falls apart again. But until then, he needs to be on his best behavior... and he needs to plan what truths are safe for him to reveal this time around.
This can't last, and he knows it. ]